Saturday, January 1, 2011

New Beginnings

Here I am at home on yet another New Year's Eve.  

As I sit and reflect on the past 12 years, since E entered my life, I realise I have spent pretty much most New Year's Eves home and usually alone, with the TV, computer and child (E).  This year he has discovered Xbox Live, and so he is happily annihilating things in a game called Halo.  

As I reflect on this last year, and this last week, where I have felt a little blue and down about (E)  behaviour, future and life - mine and his.    Looking on the net for people with similar circumstances/stories I came across a couple of interesting blogs, and was inspired to start my own.   What better way than to write, about my journey and maybe it will help some one else on a similar path.

I guess I should introduce myself, I am 46 (in 3 weeks) year old single mum of 3, my first 2 kids are now boy 22 (J) and girl 20 (R)  these 2 NT (neuro typicals) and i were in a nuclear family situation, until their father decided he wanted something else and moved on.   From then on I was a single mum, I stuggled to regain self worth, balance etc while trying to do what was best for the kids we moved house but stayed in same area for school and friends.   
I returned to school to do some studying part time and life levelled out a bit, until my life took a turn and tumble, I met a guy who wasn't right for me but allowed a "relationship" mainly physical to form.  
We called it off after about 5 months, finding out I was pregnant a month later...   after a normal pregancy (although there was emotional stress) my youngest child, a son (E)  was born.

Things seem normal for a few months (E) acheived normal milestones at normal times, but I started noticing small differences in his behaviours.  He was very attached to me.  Not really comfortable in others arms...  he needed less sleep than my other 2 and seemed very observant, and loved going to sleep in the swing chair or bouncer and once sitting up in car seat the car.  He hated the "capsule"  I think there wasn't enough stimulation just lying therelooking at ceiling. 

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