Wednesday, January 12, 2011


I need sleep, I have to get up in 2 hours to take Miss 20 to the airport for an overseas trip, and I took Master AS12 to bed at about 11.   If we had gone to sleep then I would have gotten 4+ hours sleep.   I had warned Master AS about the impending bedtime, and thought that by taking him into my room to sleep he would fall asleep quicker, and therefore so will I.  

We are on school holidays at the moment and Master AS12 has had fairly flexible sleep times, going to bed later and getting up later,   most nights going to bed around 11pm and getting up about 10am   o there i was thinking he was getting quite a bit of sleep.     

Tonight I found out that although he "goes" to bed, he has been getting up and raiding the fridge/cupboards and going online (Facebook and Mine Craft game)  and not sleeping till about 4 am   no wonder he has been sleeping till 10am ( i have loved the 2 hours i get alone in the AM)    

Of course tonight I wanted things to change i needed sleep so I changed the "rules" and he is restless, making noises, trying to talk,  wriggling about... I had to get out of bed as I was getting angry and ready to lash out verbally or physically.    Maybe I should have just let him stay up and drag him out when we needed to go?
but I find I don't sleep well when I know he is up.   (In fact I havent slept well for a while so maybe i knew he was up in an unconscious level)

I found 2 more ASpie blogs in trying to research sleep and the Asperger child, and am glad to find out I am not the only one, finding their child sleepless.

When I think of his sleep patterns since birth he has always had a problem, getting to sleep especially, although generally once asleep he stays asleep till morning getting up at a reasonable 7.30 during school terms but   as he hits the pre pubescence he is finding it harder to get to sleep and harder to get up.   I think if he could totally chose he would sleep a lot of the day and stay up at night??   argghhh

I am seriously considering medication to get him to sleep, but maybe tonight it is my own sleeplesness talking.. when the kids were small I would often say I can cope with anything as long as I get enough sleep!!    and I am not...... ;-(

where to from here ???  i dont know, with Miss 20 being away for a while it will be just Master AS12 and I, maybe we can form some sort of routine, acceptable to both of us, re sleep.  Luckily I am on holidays from work......   I may need some day time naps I think.....

Wednesday, January 5, 2011


As this is just the start of my blog here, many of the posts will be like ramblings......   a mish mash of thoughts events, processes .

My journey into accepting that my youngest child has Asperger's  and is on the autism spectrum..  has taken about 12years.

I still don't have an officail diagnosis, the last "test" at Autism SA  came back with the verdict that he met many of the official  criteria he didn't meet the obsession category...  hmmm   i work hard not to allow any one thing take over our lives (luckily I can) i know others where it just can't be done ,...    and since then HALO (an Xbox game ) has taken on a whole obsessive element.......

I wasnt asked (or dont remember) being asked about his food foibles.

but boy does he have them ...    i wil shre these in another post....

Saturday, January 1, 2011


Labels are useful....   we use them all the time, to lnow what inside things such as cans

Imagine trying to "cook" a meal from these cans, what clues do we have to whats inside??   the small one on the left may have corn kernals, but will they be whole or creamed??    Do any of these have the tuna i want??   and if the can is soup what kind????

Or what about books with out labels  how would we know  if it was a cook book, a novel or a biography.

People need lables too  we call them names.  As parents we think long and hard about the names we give our kids.  I looked into the meanings of my childrens names and made sure initials would be ok and then thought of people I knew with the name,  and finally thought about using the name at least 50 times a day. ;-) ....   I have heard of people looking into the numerology of the name, and of course there is the family politics to contend with.

depending where you get the figures from but Autism Vic  states that the incidence of asd is somewhere 1in 200-500.

ADHD figures suggest 3-5 in 100 (Usa)
i could go on and on about the various labels we give kids.

But the ones I am interested in Aspergers and ADHD  as they are the labels been directed at my youngest son (E) 

At the moment I am questioning are these labels helpful??    or a hindrance??

New Beginnings

Here I am at home on yet another New Year's Eve.  

As I sit and reflect on the past 12 years, since E entered my life, I realise I have spent pretty much most New Year's Eves home and usually alone, with the TV, computer and child (E).  This year he has discovered Xbox Live, and so he is happily annihilating things in a game called Halo.  

As I reflect on this last year, and this last week, where I have felt a little blue and down about (E)  behaviour, future and life - mine and his.    Looking on the net for people with similar circumstances/stories I came across a couple of interesting blogs, and was inspired to start my own.   What better way than to write, about my journey and maybe it will help some one else on a similar path.

I guess I should introduce myself, I am 46 (in 3 weeks) year old single mum of 3, my first 2 kids are now boy 22 (J) and girl 20 (R)  these 2 NT (neuro typicals) and i were in a nuclear family situation, until their father decided he wanted something else and moved on.   From then on I was a single mum, I stuggled to regain self worth, balance etc while trying to do what was best for the kids we moved house but stayed in same area for school and friends.   
I returned to school to do some studying part time and life levelled out a bit, until my life took a turn and tumble, I met a guy who wasn't right for me but allowed a "relationship" mainly physical to form.  
We called it off after about 5 months, finding out I was pregnant a month later...   after a normal pregancy (although there was emotional stress) my youngest child, a son (E)  was born.

Things seem normal for a few months (E) acheived normal milestones at normal times, but I started noticing small differences in his behaviours.  He was very attached to me.  Not really comfortable in others arms...  he needed less sleep than my other 2 and seemed very observant, and loved going to sleep in the swing chair or bouncer and once sitting up in car seat the car.  He hated the "capsule"  I think there wasn't enough stimulation just lying therelooking at ceiling.